Sunday, February 13, 2011

Verstehen

Ello everyone. 

I’m sorry about how late this post is. For those of you who see those little comments I put up on facebook I mentioned that I had been in the hospital the greater part of last week. This is very true and it has really hurt my schedule. I don’t even want to think about how many due dates got shot in the face with this untimely IV filled segment of my life, but my blog post for this week was a part of it.

I have been trying to grope at a story to tell you all since I got released from the hospital only so many hours ago, but nothing is sounding good as I write it. Sure the actual visit is a story in and of itself, but I want it to be written well. Everything I’ve been writing just comes out as garbage right now.

So I’ve decided to write to you all about what is on my mind; not to force the pen, instead let my ideas flow out free form.

This trip to the hospital has been a nightmare. I have not been able to walk since last Tuesday morning; almost a week ago. Let me say walking is a very big part of my life. Moving in general is a huge part of my life. Being forced not to move, and then having my arms pinned down by IV’s has been my own personal hell. Severe pain, numerous drugs and really bad television; I’ve had a bad week.

But this week has forced me to think about a lot of things. Who I am, why I do the things I do, where I am in my life, and I’m not going to lie I did not like what I was concluding.

I’m a grumpy person. Plain and simple. The hospital sure was not helping but it’s a common truth about myself.

I am not happy with anything!

I could rule the world I would just ask for the moon.

Avarice is my greatest sin.

It is not that I lack appreciation, or a goal. I am just never content with an end. That is probably why I have so many stories in the first place. I just never stop. My story ends? I jump into a new one the next second.

I love my adventurous life do not get me wrong, I do choose this.

The error I see is that I never really enjoy what I have accomplished. I accept it is a good thing, put it on a shelf and run on. Never taking a break.

This hospital break is connected to that. I broke down. Now for near a week I’ve been unable to move and it has been miserable!

I just think it’s time for a change of perspective.

The word “Verstehen” comes to mind. It’s a German word and it means to put oneself in another’s shoes; loosely.

I think that is what I am aiming for with this blog of mine, and why I enjoy all of you reading my works so much. I want all of your responses to help show me different perspectives on things and help get me out of this funk I’m just rolling around in.
You know that makes a lot of sense…

But knowing my luck this post will just get lost in a sea of my other posts…

Maybe I’ll make a page for it or something.

Regardless thank you everyone for reading and commenting and helping me out.

It means a lot to me and I promise to keep at it.

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