Friday, September 16, 2011

Omnibus 2

I am afraid,

Of just about everything.

No seriously I am.

Everything new or foreign to me, so a lot of things, freaks me the hell out. You want to see me freak out? Watch me try  to get a job. I FLIP* out.  

* I only literally flipped that one time, which was just because my job at the time wanted to know if I could. I cannot.

I do however fight these fears. I don’t let them stop me from living my life. In fact is is likely because of them that I try so hard in almost everything I do. I have to try that much harder just to get there.

I desire to be unique.

Not that people cannot do what I do. Nor that I cannot do what others do. I strongly believe that everything has at some point been done. 

I just want to choose what I want to do outside of the influences from society and my peers. 

which reminds me....

I hate most norms of society. 

Don't get me wrong, some are great. The whole "Don't randomly kill people" one is very good in my opinion. 

It is the close minded ones that hold back change, the future, and everything that keeps the world interesting that I hate. I will in fact be very vocal about this, draw many pictures about it, and much more if provoked. 

So if you want an intense conversation of passion, pull this one out on me. 

Not quite sure how to connect to this one but,

I am lonely. 

So very much so. There is a part of me deep inside that I cannot seem to fill no matter how hard I try. My heart screams out that a person can fill that void inside me, but as it stands, I am very lonely. 

I'm not sure why, I feel loved, I know I am cared for. Something inside me however constantly battles with me and leaves me feeling lonely. 

Ironically enough the more people are around the more lonely I feel. 

I'm not much of a party kinda guy I guess.

Some of you may want to know however, 

How to make me happy.

I am in all matters of the word, fun, when I am happy. Ask anyone I work with or play with. I am so much more, and in general, fun when I am happy. 

Wanting me to be happy is a direct benefit for everyone around. 

I'm not especially hard to make happy either. 

See those giant words I wrote up there? 

That is the gist of my point here. 

Encourage me. 

Be creative about how you try and make me happy. 

Instead of just thinking that you may have a good time with me, let me know. I love to know that people think. By voicing your opinion un-requested like that, I promise you will get a smile. 

Presents are wonderful things. A little one can go a long way. 

Something as simple as a sticky note, or a random text, telling me something you like about me, or something you would like to do just us. 

That will make me happy. 

Biggest of all though? I am super duper happy when I accomplish something. So if you want to win in the long run, help me on any of my many projects I work so hard on. Pay day is when we accomplish something major in the project.

I promise it is worth it. 

If you need me to forgive you...

What the hell did you do? 

I am not an easy person to upset like that. I may get disappointing, roll my eyes easily, and even groan a whole lot, but if you get to the point where you need my forgiveness.... 

Well I hope you at least read this. That is a step in the right direction. 

There are only a few key triggers that will get me super pissed off.

At that point, I hope you are sorry for what you did. 

Fighting with me over it will do absolutely nothing but turn me into a malicious word spewing serpent.

I promise that is not a good thing. 

Try the conventional methods. Say sorry, try to make me happy, that is a big one, and most of all do not do it again. 

I'll likely never forget what you did, but I always move forward. So work with forward. 

Oh yeah, those key things...

I will be upset, no questions about it, if you...

Scream. I hate it when people scream. Raise your voice? Sure. Change your tone? Any time you want. 

But my god if you scream. Like an "I'm mad at you, myself, whatever" scream. You will have unlocked a primal evil in my soul that will be hell bent on removing any part of your mind that found that to be a good idea. Done and done. Do NOT do that if you ever want to get along with me. **

** mind you if you need to scream for an emergency that is totally different. If you scream as in a  "help!" scream. I will drop everything to figure out/fix the problem. 

Stop talking to me. Communication is a huge key in my life. I don't need to hear from people all the time, but if we are friends, or what have you, we need to talk and communicate.

 Especially if we are upset with one another! 

Negative feelings about one another fester over time. Without words, we will lose everything without even trying. 

In fact our lack of action will be the weapon that did the deed of killing our relationship. 


Anonymous said...

The more I read, the more I know, & the more I like!!!

Mr. Joshua said...

Thank you thank you. :)